Meet and greet

I don't know what to talk about, but I need to get this next post done because of my not being here tomorrow. What I was supposed to be doing was going to get a tattoo. But while I was in school yesterday, my aunt called around to a ton of places, and they all said that before I can get my tattoo, I have to go there in person at least once for a Meet & Greet.

So at a M&G, we basically just sit there talk. I have to show them exactly what I want for a tattoo, show them where I want to put it, then tell them what colors I want. Then they'd discuss with me how much that particular spot would hurt, or would gaining or losing weight effect the overall tattoo. Then after all that, we'd decide a cost for the tattoo, then I can set up an actual appointment to get my tattoo. And that could take up to two weeks.

So not only am I missing tomorrow for this annoying M&G thing, but in about two weeks I'll be missing school again (wait, don't we have vacation in two weeks?) so I'll actually be able to get my tattoo. This is a very long process, and I don't like it haha. But the tattoo will be totally worth it when I get it.

Unfortunately, though, unlike Nat, I don't have a very good reason for getting a tattoo. She had a beautiful reason for wanting her tattoo. I simply want mine because I like the appearance of the ink and think it looks cool. But there's no back story to it at all. So, hopefully I won't start hating it after I get it haha.This is the tattoo that I'm getting:

Lazarus

I recently saw the movie Lazarus Effect. It's about bringing people back from the dead with special serum called Lazarus. The movie was great, a little unsettling though. The main plot of the movie is that we, as humans, only use 10% of our brains at a time, but we have no idea what the unused 90% does. So, when the Lazarus brings Zoe back to life, she's now using 100% of her brain, and can do all this paranormal shit and it's really creepy.

My whole point to this is, though, is that this could be entirely possible. Not the whole Lazarus serum thing, I don't think it'd be possible to bring the dead back (and because of the movie, I hope it never happens), but what would happen if we used all of our brain instead of just a portion?

Now before you think I'm crazy, think about it for a second. We use ten percent of our brains. We're average humans, great. Albert Einstein could solve math equations just like that. He was the smartest man in the world. Do you really think someone so smart could only use ten percent of his brain? I think he may have been using twenty percent of his brain, or more.

So what would happen if we used all of our brain? Would we be able to do supernatural things like the movie suggests? Would we become evil, like Zoe? Or would the power be too much for us and slowly wear and tear away at our bodies and souls? 

That movie seriously messed me up. I'm so paranoid about literally everything right now.

Mirror Move

I have no idea what to talk about. I'm not in the best place at the moment. I don't know why I feel sad, but I do. I shouldn't be sad, though. I literally have everything. I have friends, I have family, a loving boyfriend. I even already have somewhere to move to once I graduate. I am graduating, going to a Fall Out Boy concert. I should be the happiest kid in the world right now.

But, I'm not. I feel like there's something missing. Or that there's too much. Maybe I'm not actually sad. Maybe it's just that I'm not happy. Surprisingly, there's a difference. One of my dreams is to live in a big city. To have an apartment with a balcony, to get a good job and be able to travel. But I feel like I'm weighted down. I don't have money. I'm gonna be stuck in this town after graduation. I'm basing a lot of my future on just one group of people.

My family whines and complains when I talk about wanting to leave. "Brandy left, too, and we miss her every day." But the thing is, she left for a man. I'd be leaving for myself. I love my family, I really do. But they drive me crazy and I can't stand to be near them. I'm stuck seeing them every single day, and I hate it. I don't feel like I'm an independent person. I never was independent. Literally everything I do is just a mirror move of my relatives. I'm sick of being a reflection. I just want out.

Providence

Hey guys! Sorry I didn't comment on anyone's posts. I've read a couple of them but I've been too busy to sit down and write much. Had a SIX AND A HALF HOUR DRIVE to Providence today! Mom took a wrong turn. Twice (grrr). The trip was kinda fun though. Lots of talks with mama haha. Can't believe I'm 18 now. It's a little unreal. I know this probably isn't technically a post, but whatever.

Funny stories, though. First off. Went to this place called Margaritas, and mama told our waitress it was my birthday. When the waitress left, ma told me that they sometimes like to sing. An hour later, I heard a bunch of clapping and mama started grinning. I hid my face with my hand and said "fuck me" and the waitress stuck a sombrero on my head, and she, along with several other workers, started singing happy birthday to me. In Spanish. It was so embarrassing! On the bright side...I got to keep the hat!

Also. I might die this weekend. If I don't come back, don't question it haha. The hotel mama picked out seems cute. It's nice, calm. We didn't wanna go anywhere so we decided to order pizza delivery. The guy that answered the phone said he will deliver to the lobby. But for safety reasons, they won't go to the actual rooms. They're fine with the ghetto, but they do not like Hotel 6.

There's also peculiar splatters of red stuff on one of the shelves at floor level (good god) and there are dead bolts on the door...so. This is going to be an interesting weekend.

Oh! We also walked into the hallway to get ice chips, and were overtaken by the smell of pot. Woo! Yeah. We're in shit butt city tonight.

Red Dots

This is my second post here, but it's supposed to be my first. I thought I was supposed to make a post yesterday when we created our blogs, but I was wrong. LOL. Oh well. So, now I have two posts. This one is about a really fucked up dream I had last night (3/24/15). I woke up with heaving breathing and didn't like the feeling of dread it left me. Before I actually start the story, let me tell you about my bedroom at night. I have a tv in my room, kinda high up (about the height of a person) and there are two little red lights that like to blink every so often. Normally, that doesn't bother me. But it does now.

So, you know how when you dream, you always start in the middle of your dream? I can't remember when I actually fall asleep and start dreaming (I wonder if it's like that for everyone). It was kind of like that. My dream started in the middle. Not even. It was sort of the beginning of the end. My aunt Nicki and I were driving, and we were out in the middle of nowhere. Not sure where we were going, or why, but we were lost.

After a while of driving, we found a little store, so we decided to stop and ask for help. The parking lot was pretty much empty. There were two men outside arguing, and their car was beside ours. Being too nervous to get out of the car (as she would be in the real world), Nicki decided that we would just sit in the car and wait for the men to leave. They started walking toward their car, still yelling.

One of the men tripped, and fell on the ground beside Nicki's window. His companion pulled a gun out of his jacket and aimed it at the ground. Knowing what was gonna happen, Nicki covered her face and ears and tried to pretend nothing was going on. I, on the other hand, sat there staring. Then the trigger was pulled, and blood splattered all over our car and on the window. Nicki screamed, and so did I. I remember my dream self thinking 'I'm going to die now. I can't believe I'm going to die.'

As the thought ran across my mind, the sky turned dark red, and the face of the man blackened. I couldn't see any facial features, couldn't see his clothes. He was just a silhouette. I could see his head turn and look at the two of us screaming. His face wasn't visible, but it was still terrifying. His eyes were small red beads that were glowing. Then, a white line appeared on his face, and I could tell that it was a twisted smile. He aimed his gun at the window and had it pointed directly at me, and then he pulled the trigger.

That's when I woke up. I sat bolt upright, breathing heavily and gasping for air. My shoulder hurt, almost as if it were actually shot, and I could feel tears streaming down my face. I looked up for a brief moment, and saw the little red lights that my tv gave off. I thought he was in my room and panicked, so I grabbed the hammer from under my bed (don't ask why it's there haha), and turned the light on. Two hours later, when I finally tried to fall back asleep, I heard my dog bark in the hall way, and listened as a car turned on outside and drove away.

Untitled ideas

Okay, so I have no idea what I'm actually supposed to be writing about. Something I'm doing or am interested in, I guess.

One thing I'm interested in is writing :p I like writing, I just don't always know what to say. I also don't really know when to stop writing, or how to end or where to start. There's one story I wanna start working on, but I haven't really started it yet. It's kinda inspired by a show I watched several years ago called Fullmetal Alchemist (that show is emotionally devastating, don't watch it).

Anyway, in the story I wanna write, it's the year 2149 (my favorite 'future' year. Blame Terra Nova for that). Military officials are going around to various high schools trying to find students to draft into the army. Laws have gone back to the way they used to be - women can't serve. But this one girl (not yet named) gets picked to fight in the war and be drafted. The nation is baffled, and her parents become clinically depressed about losing their daughter.

When the military chooses her, they drag her down from the bleachers and have prosthetic arms, legs, and other vital organs laid out on tables. In front of the whole school, her right leg is cut off, and replaced with a prosthetic. Then they do the same to her left arm. While still conscious, they cut her eyes out, and replace them with fake ones that are full of technology. She can now take pictures of the things she sees by blinking her eyes, lock on to targets more efficiently, and several other things.

Being turned into the first female cyborg, she isn't sure what to think. All she knows is that she needs to fight to get out alive.


So, that's all I have to say, I guess. I don't know how to continue. I don't even know if people would care to read something like that haha. It's...violent. I'm not sure how many people would like that. Anyway, I'm running off now. Gonna go watch Corpse Princess.